Sunday 2-10-19 Conversation 15, Flat Heart

Happy Sunday! I want to have a good conversation today.
Connection in my heart; this notebook is not filling up (started a new dream/vision notebook on 1-1-19); as it’s been a long time since posting on my blog.
Can we focus on the first? What do you think is happening in your heart?
It feels flat.
I feel that with having the broader perspective of Source (the ALL Love: Omnipotent, Omniscient, Onmipresent, Consciousness of ALL) that I don’t know where to give devotion to. I enjoy those devotional states but have not been able to hold them (in my past spiritual forays).
What about you? (I understood this as devotion to self.)
I don’t know what to do with that. I know what’s coming … don’t say it.
You are God.
I don’t know what to do with that (and now feel uncomfortable about ever posting this as it could lead to judgment by others.)
You take care of you and let others be who they are. Let’s go back to You, your heart … devotion.
Whew – thanks. Ok, how do you incorporate Self as God, here, now, and still be a functional human with humility?
Does God not have ALL including humility? As well as great Love for others, wisdom, and knowing what the other needs?
Yes. I am thinking of others on the mystic path who are able to hear their guides and follow – surrender. It seems to me that they are still surrendering to the idea of something outside themselves. (In the form of devotion to a Deity.)
Yes. This is the next step, to know and accept that it is Self.
Is this the difference between some devotee/mystics and Sadhguru? (I’m thinking of mystics who hold great devotion to their knowing of their Lord and then act from the internal guidance provided to them.) One has their guide that they listen to and holds lovely devotion to. Sadhguru shows such confidence and wisdom. His devotion seems to come in planned formal ceremony.
Yes, different steps. There is the need for both. One moves the individual up; one moves a society.
(Something is coming. I feel weepy.) So I am being prep’d for more?
But it feels cold.
You must learn to bring the bliss down to you, into you.
Isn’t that what’s happening with devotion to a higher being?
They-you make a stream connection of light OR you match a vibration to connect to receive messages or insight. To connect to Source is to allow ALL that you are to be present within you. It is expansion more than raising of vibration.
And Sadhguru’s ecstatic states come from?
Just allowing connection.
So tell me how. (A thought entered my mind that expressed as …) I love my high heart as I feel happy and get a smile reflex when I connect there. Is this the way to bliss?
We’re seeking more than being ‘blissed out’. As Sadhguru tells, this is the symptom of the awareness. You were getting closer last week with your imagery (during meditation) of the leaf seeking the awareness of the branch, tree, ALL through the stem at the back of your head.
Where I hold the tension?
It can go away?
Oh Yes.
(I took a break for Sunday lunch, so now I am back to continue.)
While I was driving, I felt very energized from this conversation. I was thinking perhaps this is leading to my being special but I know that couldn’t be right. To get clarity I thought of us all being leaves on the tree. I was able to bring this all together by instead thinking of myself as a flower, a blossom on a tree which is going to have a vast number of blossoms. Therefore, special in being a flower, special to be an early bloom to help bring energy and show the way for all the blooms to come. I contemplated my blossom-ness as that of an azalea or forsythia with many blooms on the tree but those flowers just seem short lived and gone. I decided I want to be a cherry blossom so that my flower will transform into a fruit to feed others and be a seed for the future.
Beautiful. Use that in meditation to find your tree energy.
Yes. Please help me to expand my meditation practice.
Take credit for your Qigong too. Good to connect to the body.
I want to ask about my heart, I said it feels cold and flat.
That is how you put it. How about it being what understanding (of others) and compassion feel like? Peaceful. (What you arrive at) when you understand that the other has their own perspective from their history and choices of today.
I don’t feel that I show honoring of the other or kindness.
It will come. You still have turmoil of old reactions and feelings as habits. You get to the understanding (from) following the initial reaction.
This concerns me, I notice the (my) reactions, the judgments, the dry cold responses just to move things along. Sadhguru is my example, isn’t he?
Yes, (he is) going through life, getting things done. He is not working to appease any individual! He is providing the wisdom they require for understanding and making of choices.
So he has to make time for the heart, for Love and devotion?
Yes. But, (he) also acts as a reflection. When in the presence of children he reflects the Love and playfulness. When in the presence of seekers he provides what they seek. When in the presence of the Deity he provides the devotion. It’s just reflecting.
So this is what bringing thru my higher Self will effect – my being a reflection?
What else would God be but a reflection back to the individual of what they seek?
“Law of Attraction.” This is God?
More than that. All the things you know: God seeking to know it Self, individualizing, allowing for free will, individual desires, creating what is desired.
And where is Love?
Love is the medium, the atmosphere of it All. The steps cannot occur without unconditional Love to allow every desire and experience to unfold. AND, first and foremost is God loving it Self to want to know ‘This One’.
The same lesson Sadhguru teaches, that we individuals need to seek – to know ‘this one’. It really seems crazy, that if this is the “Big Purpose” that we little humans can go through lifetimes never looking at ourselves to wonder and seek to know, to understand.
It’s changing.
Just surviving is no longer primary focus.
All of that seems like a waste of time to me now when I feel the excitement growing as each day I understand myself better. I know you need the heavy and dark to understand and appreciate the light and lite. It just feels sad … all the people and time periods of pain and suffering.
Just experience Dearest. Release it as it is just a blink of an eye in eternity. It is just recorded events for comparison. Just as you have sad animal or famine TV commercials or violent movies that enter your awareness briefly (these are mentioned as they tend to really upset me). The thoughts of them can aid in perspective of what’s before you NOW.
But the sadness can return and still be felt.
Your humanness … so sensitive to the emotional vibrations. Still, you can choose another feeling, another perspective. Send it Love, hold it in compassion. Question, are you feeling what is real or what has been projected on you to feel?
I feel like there is a message here, that everything felt by the emotions (of the heart in question now) may not be real and can be manipulated.
Yes. Understand your body is a tool, emotions sense vibrations. This doesn’t mean that what is being picked up is in need of action, thought, or acceptance as real or important.
I am now thinking of the guidance system Abraham (Hicks) taught me: feels good – follow; feels bad – I’m going against my best path. This would give meaning to emotions not as just vibrations.
This is a tool for guidance when choices need to be made. But, vibrations/emotions are coming into your system all of the time so be aware to differentiate.
And, what about the feelings of others that I am connected to, is it wrong or right to not sense and react to their emotions?
There are many who don’t sense others’ emotions and yet they are in loving relationships. Others need to be responsible for saying what they want just as you are. You are not responsible to sense their needs.
Explain how this is different then what was said earlier about reflecting?
Re-read it.
… reflecting what they seek versus what they think they need.
I feel this has gone away from the initial conversation and of [say it] accepting me as God. (An aspect perhaps … I’m trying.)
Still not there yet. Blossom! Bloom!
… need time to reflect.

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