Sunday 10-18-15 Heartsong

singing bird

Happy Sunday!
A song in your heart has to do with your attitude. You have to be grateful in your thoughts and expect good things from God. ~ Joel Osteen
I woke this morning at 7:48 am.  My mind said, ‘good, just in time for Joel’.  I ran to the bathroom and then back to bed waiting for 7:58 to turn the TV on.
Earlier this week I had the opportunity to mention that I only used my bedroom TV on Sunday mornings to watch Joel – I chose not to mention it as I was with my co-workers.  “What would I have said?” I wonder to myself if I had brought it up and was asked why I watched Joel.  I would have said he is a ‘magic man’ because he always speaks about just what I need to hear.
The TV got turned on, on time. Joel appeared on my screen at 8:00 am.  Within the first few words he spoke I knew he was there for me.  He was giving me a focal point on which to organize my thoughts and bring direction back to my journey for this Sunday morning.
I have felt different this week.  Something is not the same.  At times there is a disconnection from my everyday me.  My memory is terrible. I have found it difficult to engage my ‘at work’ self who is always on top of the critical tasks for the day.
I have also succumbed to stress and reaction.  I over-reacted to a minor situation at work.  Funny I was aware the entire time, and even stumbled over my words a bit, because I knew my words were from my personality reacting to the situation not working out as I expected while, at the same time, I was aware that it really didn’t matter.  I also got a bit stressed and preachy with my son.  Not as bad as in the past and, again I was aware of my behavior being a reaction to fear.
I am sensing a change occurring.  The thought of teetering between two ‘me’s has occurred to me.  There is the old personality, that wanted to control everything to stay within my expectations, putting up a last stand for power against the more peaceful me.
I think last week’s vision and new awareness of my light body has changed (more like expanded) how I identify myself.  I feel uncertain.  The self confidence has lessened – not because I have found something wrong with me, or that I am switching back toward feelings of my old unworthy me.  It is that I realize there is a new part of me that I don’t know about or understand yet.
I am feeling humble.
I think this is good.  Growth!  More to learn and work through what the Universe sends to me!
Joel made me realize that what was going on with me was good and part of my growth.  That is because all through my uncertainty, reactivity, and stupor I was singing.  I woke each morning with a song in my mind and heart.  I sang of love, happiness, and blessings.
Joel preached this morning that a song in your heart is a connection to God. Joel said …
“Ephesians 5:18 says to ‘be ever filled with the Spirit by speaking to yourself in psalms and hymns, by making melody in your heart and being grateful.’ Too many people go around discouraged and allow their circumstances to weigh them down. But, God has put a well of joy on the inside of you and even when life is not going your way, you can learn to tap into it. The key is keeping a song of praise in your heart. Throughout the day, take time to think about God’s goodness and live with a grateful attitude. If you do, God will replenish your strength, your joy and your peace.”
I am doing OK.
Worry causes me to think that I am losing connection, getting out of alignment, going against the flow.  Joel’s message and the songs in my heart let me know I am where I need to be.
This evening I had another confirmation of being in the flow – an answer to a question I posed last week!
Oprah interviewed Thomas Moore on Super Soul Sunday this evening.  At the end of the interview they spoke of his understanding of a difference between the soul and the spirit.
I just asked this question last Sunday when I was speaking of my light body and my sprite!
Thomas Moore said the spirit is the part that wants to evolve and transcend.  He then said the soul is the part that wants to feel at home.  My mind said to me that the soul wanting to be home sounds like female energy – being.
I then had the Ah-ha!  The spirit striving for expansion and transcendence is the doing – the male energy!
Of course, it makes so much sense, I’m yin and yang at the next level of existence  – the energy level.
So it is.
“Every journey begins with but a small step. And every day is a chance for a new, small step in the right direction. Just follow your Heartsong.” ~  Mattie Stepanek

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