Sunday 12-22-13 Live and Help Live

The Law of Dharma: Everyone has a purpose in life . . . a unique gift or special talent to give to others. And when we blend this unique talent with service to others, we experience the ecstasy and exultation of our own spirit, which is the ultimate goal of all goals. ~ The Chopra Center

Happy Sunday!

Something has been bothering me that makes me feel disconnected from Source this week.
I have a friend who is going through a hard time and it makes me feel uneasy.  I don’t know my role in it or if I am suppose to have a role in it.  My mind has been very busy thinking over everything that has happened, the things I offered to help, and the actions I have taken.  Looking back I should have recognized by the amount of thought I am giving to this that I am disconnected.
Thank you God for the weekend to give me time to think and learn!
Yesterday I was reading an ACIM lesson about forgiveness (CH29:IX) related to becoming aware of the importance we put on other people or things, stuff outside of ourselves, in the hope of finding happiness, self importance, or Love.  What struck me in the writing was that it said that we put importance (and thereby judgement) on something out of fear, thereby betraying our true selves.  We decide in our minds that something or someone has to fill a specific role so that we can be happy. In this manner we make less of others and of ourselves.
From this reading I recognized my mind was judging my friend because he was acting in a way different than what I thought was right.  I had put importance on my role in helping so I had created expectations outside of the intention of helping.
This morning Joel Osteen spoke on labels, how others put labels on us and we must choose either to be limited by holding onto the label or to remove the label to be the unique individual God made us to be.
After Joel’s sermon ended I reflected on the ideas in my mind about helping my friend.  Having realized that all the activity in my mind to figure him out was judgement and labeling his situation just so I could then feel comfortable within myself that I had figured him out.  This is bad – bad for him and bad for me.
This could be bad for him if he were to accept my label and let it limit him.  This certainly is not my goal in wanting to help someone else.  I want everyone to be aware of the great potential God has placed in each one of us.
For me I know it is bad to judge.  I don’t like that I fell into thinking I could help someone else with their problem by making judgements in my own mind.
I took a break from writing for a few hours as I felt I was blocked in writing about how my judgemental ideas were bad for me.  Several events happened that made me realize that I was not opening my heart to act from Love and compassion.
One event was hearing about a family member’s hurt and afterward I felt like I wasn’t really giving them the help that they needed.
The next thing I did was re-read Don Miguel Ruiz’s second agreement from the book The Four Agreements.  This agreement says “Don’t take anything personally.”  This lesson has been on my mind all week.  It is saying that what other people might say or how they react is not about us but about their perspective of us or the situation.  This is similar to what Joel was speaking of about taking on labels that others put on us.  After reading the chapter I came away with the sense it was not what I was trying to understand in my lesson today; I was looking for more about giving.
Finally I read today’s Daily Love blog. Mastin Kipp wrote about just what I needed to understand – having Love and compassion for another.  In his blog he asks the following:
“So when it comes to other people, I have a question, and I want you to answer honestly… What are you looking for in them? Are you looking for what’s right? Are you seeing them as doing the best that they can? Are you having compassion for them at the same level that you do for yourself or those you Love?”
No, I’m not having compassion for them.
For myself, I have great faith and expect the best from the tough situations that I personally go through but I am realizing that when someone else is suffering my mind goes right to judgement.  (And, I must admit I have not been through anything very difficult in the last two years to test my soul awareness – thank you Lord!.)
My judgement is due to that I question in my mind why they can’t have the soul perspective that I have: to have faith that things will work out; that there is a lesson to be learned; to not take personally another’s behaviour; to know we are always connected by Love – to name a few key lessons.
As I think about it, when a friend or loved one speaks angrily about someone’s behavior toward them I am able to advise compassionately, helping my loved one to change perspective and look at this third party with compassion.  I don’t think I am doing the same for my loved one but instead placing my expectations on them that they should have faith and expect the best. I also think I am trying to protect myself as the hurt of those I love can bring me hurt as well if I choose to take on the pain and worry.
So how to I help and advise with Love and compassion?
Mastin says we must let them ‘off the hook’ as we would ourselves by being compassionate of all the struggles they are dealing with.
I agree with him but I know another way that I have closed myself off from this week and that is to ask for help.
I know that pausing to bring the intention of Love to the situation and then asking within my self for guidance will bring the right perspective to my heart and mind.  I hope that in this way I can learn compassion.
Yes I want to move from judgement and be an example of Love to the world.  I think I have learned to bring light to what we see as our mundane everyday lives.  I need to learn the tools and use them to help others who are hurting.  I also must choose Faith over fear to be able to offer compassion.
One last thing on the idea of labels, in my reflections this morning on judgement I had the thought that if I really thought I could sum up anyone in one word the only possible word would be LOVE, and there is no way to put limits on that.
Lord, help me to not put limits on any of my brothers.
“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.” ~ Albert Einstein

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