“As long as you think of your real self as the person you are, then of course you’re going to be fearful of death. But what is a person? A person is a pattern of behavior, of a larger awareness. You know, the two-year-old dies before the three-year-old shows up, the three-year-old dies before the teenager shows up.” ~ Deepak Chopra

Happy Sunday!

To find my motivation for writing this morning I started by reading my blog posting from last Sunday.
Have you noticed that I have posted the same quote that I ended with as my introduction quote today?
The central statement ‘a person is a pattern of behavior of a larger awareness’ struck me strongly this Sunday morning. I now see that this is a simplified way of saying what I wrote of last week as I reflected on sharing with others ‘who I am’.  I wrote last week to find acceptance in describing myself as the pattern of behavior someone will experience from me in the situations that we will share together.  I need to be OK with identifying with small parts of me when I soooo want to express my awareness of my larger self.
I think my lesson now is that there is a time and place for expressing each part of me.
I imagine sitting in a meeting a work and when going around the table for introductions saying “I am an eternal being having a human experience” that the technical points I need to contribute might be ignored because I have already been labeled as ‘woo-woo’.  As I further think about it, when I do sit in meetings sometimes I describe myself as project manager and sometimes engineer based on what I am there to contribute to the meeting.
My larger Self always wants to contribute! Perhaps this is why I feel the struggle that expressing just the traits of my human role is not enough.
I want to be comfortable that it is enough.  I also want to know that in the background I am bringing Love to every situation.
Can I be aware of both? Can bring the best of me to both the large and small aspect of every experience?
This is what I want to learn now.
I feel like I am on the verge of a breakthrough!
When I am with my family I can be the sister but I can Love BIG. The daughter, the wife, the mother … be the role I came to be for them but Love with all that I am!
My heart feels full.
This is what I am ready to release.  I don’t like feeling like I have to suppress my true Self, that I cannot express all that I want to, all the thoughts and ideas that my larger awareness brings to me.  I feel the roles I play each day limit me.  I have felt contempt for them as they restrict expressing my True Self.  This work today is helping.
I just went through my blog as a past thought was trying to surface.  I found what I was looking for in my blog of 3-8-15 on ‘Oneness’.  On that day I realized that we Love by just being who we came to be, when we live happily fulfilling the purpose we came to express.  Now I should accept my Self as a loving part of the wholeness of life.
I think I am looking too far ahead.
I want to Love bigger, bolder, have more impact. But, for my purpose NOW, today, I am doing well.  I know I can bring all that Love into my experiences today.  I can desire more in the future but remember to not judge myself as less because my desires are great.
Stay in alignment Tricia!
My analogy for today is that of my being the funnel.  I can capture an expansive amount of Universal Love and focus it down to the point of my physical attention.  As I do the work I do in this life and interact with the people that are in my life I can Love well by being my True Self in the role I have to share.
Lord, let me be aware of the Love and the focus of the Love.  In this way I think I can move through this world with awareness of you, ‘All That Is’, with me always.
Namaste’
“People grow when they are loved well. If you want to help others heal, love them without an agenda.” ~ Mike McHargue