“Man should remember to do every little action, every little kindness, every act of generosity with his whole heart, without the desire of getting anything in return making a trade out of it. The satisfaction must be in doing it and in nothing else.” ~ Hazrat Inayat Khan
Happy Sunday!
When I was a teenager I decorated my bedroom in bright primary colors of red, yellow, and orange.  It was an important project for me, one of the first displays of my identity, so with great care and thought I chose everything, all the way to the wall hangings.  One thing I knew for sure that I wanted was to have my initial on the wall just like Mary Tyler Moore had a large M hanging in her apartment so I went down to the local ceramic shop to find one.  I found my initial to take home but I left the store with two items that day.   A small plaque also caught my attention; it had vertical lettering that spelled out the word “Talk” with each line saying the following:

Try

A

Little

Kindness

 
As I think about the message of the plaque I feel regret that I didn’t understand and make it a practice of my life what the message now says to me.  I always liked the message of ‘try a little kindness’ but I didn’t understand the connection with the word ‘Talk’.
I am thinking about how I felt as a youth, about how I thought that what was expected of me was to be good and that this meant “if you can’t say anything nice than don’t say anything at all.”  I wrote about this phrase in my life previously and just looked it up –  funny it was exactly a year ago, June 9, 2013 (Good girl).
A year ago I wrote how not speaking caused me to hold onto negative thoughts that my ego brought up and to believe they were truth.  If I had spoken many of my thoughts perhaps they would have lost their power by being shared and questioned.  What I realized in my writing of a year ago was that by not talking I was not being kind to myself.
What I didn’t understand in my youth, and even a year ago, was how to talk and be kind.  I just didn’t know how to do it.  How to be kind when you knew you were right in your thoughts and the other person was just wrong?  I was separate from them, and different; as I didn’t like conflict I wasn’t going to tell them I thought they were wrong.
This reflection on communication is showing me the growth I have had in this past year.  I have sought to learn about Love and Compassion; God has provided to me many lessons and insights so that today I can speak kindly.
What has changed?
I know we are not separate, we are all the same.  We all have the same struggles in this life of feeling helpless, unworthy, and unlovable so we pretend.  We grab onto things of this world to make us feel better about ourselves as we are all struggling to deal with this life of form instead of opening up to know that our true ETERNAL selves are REAL and OK.
When you see yourself in another that is compassion.  When you know deep down you are OK then you know deep down that they are also OK.  So today, for the first time in my life, I am confident that I can TALK and also be KIND.
In the past talking for me was a struggle, it was the place where our separateness was most evident – like a battlefield.  Now I have a new feeling about talking, it has become a place of sharing.
This reflection began this morning for me from my daily email from “Bowl of Saki” with the message of “Selfishness keeps man blind through life.” by Hazrat Inayat Khan.  As I read about selfishness I began to identify with it but halfway through the message it changed to speak about kindness to others (see the quote at the top of the page).  I realized the message was saying to me that kindness is the opposite of selfishness.
I can do kindness!  After today’s reflection I can do it even better!
Namaste’  (I bow to the divine in you)
“Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love.” ~ Lao Tzu