“The smart have their theories, the wise have their scars.” ~ Wayne Wirs
Happy Sunday!
There is someone in my life who lately I have been continuously feeling critical about. Why can’t they choose to be peaceful and happy?
Earlier in the week I was making up conversations in my head and thinking of saying how lucky that person was because they had me as a loved one who is peaceful and happy – that it is a blessing when those close to you are in a good place.
I have been reading Wayne Wirs’ book ‘Mysical Oneness and the Nine Aspects of Being’. He writes about the steps our psyche goes through to reach the mystical perspective. In the book he tells of the thoughts of his mind and how he notices when the mind is self-absorbed by saying to himself “me, me, me.” I have begun doing this and find it is a good tool to come to awareness of your misguided thoughts.
Wayne is a self-declared mystic and I have to agree with his assessment. From his writing about himself he does have experience of God. To Wayne God is female who he refers to as Tao/God/Her.
I have traveled on a strange path these last few months. It has not been a path that has helped to strengthen my devotion or even bring me closer to my Self but I feel it was a path needed in the future to help with my acceptance and understanding of what may be coming. I hope that what I have encountered will provide me the tools to help others through growth and change.
A few days ago I said to myself that I want to write again so where have I ended up this weekend but on self-reflection.
Friday evening I walked home from the bar to have time to reflect – I ended up having a conversation with myself. What had started as a nice evening moved into lower feelings; I felt down. I think it came from all the television programs shown on the many TVs in the place. The programs were mostly games shows supported by many drug commercials. I found my mind on a rant of one critical thing after another relative to all the people and events on the TVs. To me the images were all “not this, not this, not this” – not anything relative to how I want the world to be.
Therefore, my thoughts walking home were about how the TV programming had brought me down. I was being judgmental. It all came back to me, me, me and how I wanted things to be for me to make me happier.
I then expanded these thoughts to my relationships.
Me, me, me.
They need to evolve, grow, be happy so I can feel OK.
So I can be free to not to worry about them!
Last night I was watching the Netflix show ‘Grace and Frankie”. A close friend of theirs, Babe, wanted help with suicide as she had terminal cancer. Grace said she could not condone it due to her morality. She told Babe to fight, that more could be done – showing her belief system. Frankie confronted Grace about her love for Babe – it was not unconditional.
This struck me … morality blocks unconditional love! Beliefs block as well!
I want Love to flow.
There was an earlier episode in which Grace starts a relationship with Sam Elliot. (I love Sam Elliot – my first encounter with arousal as a tween girl seeing the movie ‘Lifeguard’.) He tells Grace after a couple of dates that he is still married – his wife is ill with Alzheimer’s. Grace tells Frankie that she is going to break off the relationship. (I wasn’t happy with this as I wanted to see more of Sam Elliot. Could the open hearted acceptance written into the show make its way through this storyline?)
Grace tried to break off with him, but what seemed to be written in as divine intervention, brought the two to spending a night together. In the morning Sam’s wife had a problem and he left. Grace went to his house to bring him his cellphone which he had left behind. She met his wife. For a moment the wife knew who Grace was.
I tried to resolve in my head how love could overcome the obstacles. This show is all about that – loving past the pain and hurt of dissolving expectations, social norms, and old moralities. What I learned from reflection on this is that love, even unconditional Love, has its limits. No one else should be hurt by the actions even when the intention is love. Going back to the earlier story of the friend with cancer, Grace felt the suicide was morally wrong but she was hurting Babe by not being supportive. Babe was prepared to go.
So how do I love those that I love?
First, let go of the me, me, me and let them be them. They need to feel what there is to feel in their lives – it is why we are all here.
When they need me what do I do?
I can hear Wayne saying to let Her flow. Wayne’s teachings tell me that these are opportunities for joining with Her.
Make me a channel of your Peace!
“The less of me, the more of Her.” ~ Wayne Wirs