{"id":1264,"date":"2015-09-07T14:16:11","date_gmt":"2015-09-07T14:16:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/batesonline.org\/triciablog\/?p=1264"},"modified":"2015-09-07T14:16:11","modified_gmt":"2015-09-07T14:16:11","slug":"sept-6-15","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/triciabatessmith.com:443\/index.php\/2015\/09\/07\/sept-6-15\/","title":{"rendered":"Sunday 9-6-15 The Old Hag"},"content":{"rendered":"


\n\"cloudheartiam\"<\/a>\u201cThere can be no loss so great in life as having the spark glittering in one’s heart and yet groping in the darkness through life.\u201d ~ Hazrat Inayat Khan<\/em>
\nHappy Sunday!
\nI have a young woman in my life who struck out on a journey.\u00a0 It was a very tough bold course she chose so I wanted to be supportive.
\nI saw her undertaking as the \u2018hero\u2019s journey\u2019 that Joseph Campbell so eloquently explained to us 50 years ago and, that seems to have only become part of the awareness of the masses in the last decade.\u00a0 Last September I attended Oprah\u2019s \u201cThe Life You Want\u201d conference and one of the speakers there was Elizabeth Gilbert.\u00a0 She spoke of the hero\u2019s journey as researched and taught by Joseph Campbell and then added that in his time there was no record of women partaking in the \u2018hero\u2019s journey\u2019.\u00a0 Liz told the audience (of 90% women) that it is only in today\u2019s world that women have the opportunity to venture out to be the hero of their own lives.\u00a0 (In the past society put restrictions on women to be kept, protected, servile, or cloistered.)
\nSo I thought of all this as I thought of my young friend and I sent the intention to be supportive.\u00a0 There was something I knew from my own reading of Joseph Campbell and that was if my friend had answered \u2018the call\u2019 that the next stage would be the road of trials.\u00a0 I sent her messages of support that included the things I had learned along my path about caring for myself.\u00a0 I told her to stay present and don\u2019t worry about all the things she thinks others might expect of her. I said for her to just do her best where she is at, to have faith that she will learn what she needs to know, and that she will be able to do better with each passing day. I tried to express that gratitude was the tool to find the good (and lesson) in all the trials that were to come.
\nI was driving to work one morning this week thinking over all of the stages of the \u2018hero\u2019s journey\u2019 when a question came into my mind.\u00a0 I asked, \u201cWhat is my role in this?\u201d I immediately laughed because I recognized I was the Old Hag. When Liz Gilbert spoke of the road of trials she said that there would be people that you meet that offer gifts.\u00a0 She mentioned the Old Hag who offers wisdom or magic to be used during a future battle.
\nI am the Old Hag who offered a gift of wisdom of Self-care.
\nOn Friday I learned that my young friend had turned around to return home from her journey.\u00a0 It was a shock as I had created my own expectations.\u00a0 I am proud of myself as I took the time to let the bit of unexpected news become accepted without my opening my mouth to spew nonsense and put up resistance to this new information.\u00a0 I put things in perspective for myself by reminding me of my original intention to be supportive of her journey to find her-Self \u2013 it\u2019s not my place to say what that journey will look like.
\nThis morning I was thinking of my role of the Old Hag. I liked that role but was it a futile effort and all in vain as I didn\u2019t get to see evidence of the use of my gift?\u00a0 I returned my thoughts to the story line of the hero\u2019s journey and realized the Old Hag gave away her gift selflessly with no expectation of appearing again in the story or of knowing the outcome for the hero.
\nHere is the lesson for me \u2013 to learn to give the gift with no expectation and no judgment.
\nA few years ago my journey had me learning from Caroline Myss.\u00a0 I would listen to her lectures on her CMED Institute website.\u00a0 Caroline asked a tough question.\u00a0 She spoke to those aspiring to be healers stating that one day they will be given guidance to touch someone to heal them.\u00a0 She asked if they could just do it selflessly, doing what was asked without ever getting recognition for the healing or knowing the outcome.
\nWhen I contemplated this question years ago I found it a difficult request, to leave the ego with no satisfaction of acknowledgment or credit.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t worry about my reaction to the question back then as I knew I was not ready to serve others.\u00a0 I was still at the stage of learning to accept and love myself.
\nNow I know I am closer to my time of service so I appreciate the lesson of today.
\nHow do I give my gifts selflessly?
\nMy mind is pushing me to contemplate this question through the filter of \u2018What would Jesus do?\u2019
\nAfter the experiences of the last few weeks my beliefs now force me to change that question to \u2018What does Jesus do?\u2019
\nHe gives, serves, answers, embraces, leads, calls, and waits.
\nHe has shown me he loves me unconditionally.\u00a0 And, he shows me the way<\/u> to do the same for others on his behalf.
\nIt\u2019s very strange how comforted I feel just from this change of perception. \u00a0When I thought I would be on my own in service to other it felt like having to give of myself without return or replenishment (energy drawn away from me).\u00a0 The new idea of service with Jesus feels like it will be rewarding (abundant energy).\u00a0 It feels a more joyful offering to give without acknowledgement when it is in service of our Lord.\u00a0 Even my ego feels satisfied in giving when asked to do so as my Lord will know I did so.
\nI ask myself, \u2018why do I feel different now?\u2019\u00a0 I believed in God in all things \u2013 God in me, in the other, in the guidance that would come to ask me to serve.\u00a0 Why then did I feel alone and afraid of giving too much away?
\nThis was the impersonal God that I believed in \u2013 All That Is but somehow I was still separate.
\nJesus has given me the personal connection \u2013 through the Sacred Heart.\u00a0 When I am called to serve I will not be on my own.\u00a0 I feel I will be much more able to surrender and let things happen because it\u00a0will be a team effort.
\nThis morning, as I lied in bed, the words of Joel Osteen came into my head.\u00a0 \u201cLord Jesus, come into my heart I make you my Lord and \u2026\u201d Joel says savior.\u00a0 I still stumble over that word.\u00a0 I asked why and realized the word savior, meaning to be saved, represents for me something that is finished and requires no action on my part.\u00a0 \u2018He saved me\u2019 feels like a finished story to me.\u00a0 I decided on the word teacher.\u00a0 He is alive teaching me as I choose to evolve.
\nJesus Lives!
\n\u201cYou did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit–fruit that will last–and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you.\u201d\u00a0 ~ John 15:16<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cThere can be no loss so great in life as having the spark glittering in one’s heart and yet groping in the darkness through life.\u201d ~ Hazrat Inayat Khan Happy Sunday! I have a young woman in my life who … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[6],"tags":[16,38,44,51,52,53,65],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"yoast_head":"\nThe Old Hag in the Hero's Journey<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Learning from my role in the hero's journey. 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